IT’S A SMALL WORLD, AFTER ALL

As any city–dweller knows, one of the first things you notice when visiting a small town is how darn friendly everyone is. Strangers say hello on the street, chat while standing in line at the bank, and rush behind you to say, “You forgot your change, Ma’am.”
In bigger cities, we tend to stay more insulated from each other. There are so many people that it’s easy to tune out the bodies near you–it’s almost a survival instinct. But the unfortunate result is that this can make us city folk ruder. Sometimes they’re sins of omission–you’re zoning out on your iPod and don’t notice the mom struggling to get her stroller through a revolving door. Other times, the rudeness is more upfront. It’s pouring rain and you’re making a beeline for a cab, when someone else darts ahead of you. So you yell, “Hey, buster, that’s my cab!” You fight for the taxi because you believe it’s rightfully yours. You don’t really think about the other person’s needs or feelings. Why bother? You’ll never see him again.

You can’t get away with this in a small town. Even if you’re right as rain, duking it out for that cab (or parking space, or restaurant table) might have consequences far worse than taking the bus. The person you disagree with could be your kid’s new teacher, or the president of the garden club you’d like to join, or the town plumber. You don’t treat people like you’ll never see them again, because you know darn well you probably will–possibly on the day your septic system goes kerplewy!

But these days, the globe really is a village. A recent story in the Wall Street Journal described how rude people – loud cellphone talkers, bad drivers, etc – are now suffering fates far worse than dirty looks. Their inconsiderate behavior is being exposed on web sites like rudepeople.com and caughtya.org. All across the country, folks are pointing camera phones and webcams at neighbors who steal newspapers and able–bodied drivers who park in the handicapped space. The evidence is then posted on sites like MySpace and Flickr. The humiliated offenders often try to get the posting removed, but, as one lawyer pointed out to the Journal, if the information is accurate there’s not much a litterbug can do. 

We suppose this is a preferable alternative to punching someone in the face, and if the result is a more civil society then we are certainly glad for that. These days, no wise person can say to herself, “Oh, what does it matter? I’ll never see him again?” We’re all living in a small town now.

But wouldn’t it be nice if, instead of dedicating all this time and energy to the most obnoxious among us, we focused instead on the polite people? How about publishing the name of the sweet lady who let you cut ahead of her at the airport so you could catch your flight? Or the good egg who called you to let you know you left your cell phone at the restaurant? Or the sympathetic teenager in the checkout line who distracted your crying baby by jangling a set of shiny car keys?

We encounter lovely people like this all the time, and usually we smile, thank them, and promptly forget about the whole thing. But if we’re dedicating so much effort to exposing the people who don’t wipe down their gym equipment, then we shouldn’t we at least give equal time to the bright souls who hold open doors and give up their seats on the bus?

We think so. In fact, let’s start here. We’d love to hear your stories of good citizens doing the right thing. Go to the NICE FORUM and give that nice person in your life a shout out. Let’s give them the credit they deserve!